Joyfully Unofficial Elders

By Michael Sullivant Some years back my wife, Terri, and I entered what I like to call our “fourth quarter of life”. In both football and basketball, the fourth quarter is often the decisive quarter for a team’s success. For us, this means being deeply engaged in spreading the love and joys of being Christ-followers […]

Becoming an Extra Parent 

By Dr. Karen Struble, Clinical Psychologist  In recent years the number of Western-world households without children has risen tremendously.  Reasons abound. Some folks search for a suitable (a.k.a. real grown-up) mate, but cannot find one.  Others suffer the pain of infertility or other medical conditions.  Still others are fertile couples who choose not to bear […]

Child Maturity – Learning What Truly Satisfies

By Michel Hendricks Have you ever been hungry, and intended to eat a little snack before dinner and ended up eating way too much and ruining your appetite? Have you ever gotten so obsessed by a sport or hobby that you ignored other important things? Have you ever been hooked on a substance or behavior […]

Beyond Comfort – How Difficult Tasks Fuel Growth 

By Michael Sullivant  One of the outstanding tasks required to achieve full “childhood” maturity (age 4-14) – according to Dr. Wilder’s 20+ years of research across the centuries and cultures – is to learn to do hard things that might even cause some pain. Generally, this was a big gap in my childhood development. I […]

Understanding Child-Level Maturity

Last month we discussed the first stage of the maturity process, infant maturity. This month we will discover the next stage, child-level maturity. It is important to keep in mind that each stage builds upon – not replaces – the previous maturity stage. While the main goal of infant maturity is to learn to receive, […]

Responding to a Connection Invitation

By Marlene Allen “Mom! Dad! Look! Look at me!” is the cry of a young heart.   “Look at me. See me. Validate me. Affirm me. Help me become my own person by acknowledging that my actions have meaning. Enjoy this moment with me. It’s part of me forming my own personality. It’s me venturing out […]

We Never Outgrow the Need to Receive

By Claudia Hendricks When we hear the word “infant” our mind instantaneously tends to dismiss the topic thinking it does not concern us as adults. But when we stop to see how God has designed our brains to grow an integrated identity at an infant level, things get interesting.  The infant stage of maturity takes […]

Understanding Infant Maturity

If you’ve been around the Life Model, you’ve probably heard about the five stages of maturity: infant, child, adult, parent, and elder. If you are newer to the Life Model, the stages of maturity outline the growth process from infancy through adulthood in terms of relational skills, emotional health, and the ability to handle life’s […]

Inside Out 2 – Pernicious Anxiety

By Michel Hendricks In my previous article on the movie, Inside Out 2, we looked at the brain reconstruction that happens when we transition from child to adult around age 14. One of the consequences we see in Riley is the introduction and almost overwhelming dominance anxiety in Riley’s life. Anxiety is a new emotion […]

What Inside Out Can Teach Us About Emotion Regulation

By Claudia Hendricks There are some gems in the first Inside Out* movie that highlight how God designed our brains to help us regulate our emotions and be ourselves amid big changes. Inside Out 1 tells the story of 11-year-old Riley and her emotional reactions as her family relocates from Minnesota to San Francisco for […]

Multigenerational Community, Mental Health, and Spiritual Wellbeing

By Barbara Moon Multigenerational communities are a bonus kind of community according to the Life Model. This looks like people of different walks of life, ages, and various maturity levels enhancing each other’s growth. Multigenerational communities can occur both within a family and within various kinds of groups – including spiritual community. Families naturally have […]

Relational Brain Skills & the Life Model

By Monica Mouer I was introduced to the Life Model in the fall of 2014. As a mental health counselor and pastor’s wife at that time, I had been on a multi-year journey for my personal spiritual and emotional growth. When I came across the Life Model, I knew it was something special. The blend […]

What Does Love Look Like?

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. […]

7 Deadly Traps for Small Groups

By Jim Wilder You know that person or couple who only comes by your church or small group when there is a party? They are fun people and seem to want genuinely to connect with community. But when it’s time to volunteer with the church or the neighborhood, they don’t seem to be responding to text […]

Your Best Self Asks for Help

If you have been around the Life Model for a while, you have probably come across the maturity charts.  One aspect of child level maturity is learning to ask for what you need. Just that idea alone brings up all types of different reactions in each of us. Everyone has different thoughts, questions, arguments, fears […]

Fully Alive: Becoming True You!

By Terri Sullivant “…if indeed you heard about him and were taught in him, just as the truth is in Jesus. You were taught with reference to your former way of life to lay aside the old man who is being corrupted in accordance with deceitful desires, to be renewed in the spirit of your […]

The New Self is the True Self

But that is not the way you learned Christ!— assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus,to put off your old self,which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires,and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds,and to […]

What My Best Self Believes About God

By Jen Pfeiler “Write the first five things that come to your mind when you think about God,” Lydia calmly instructed. She looked around the group of just under a dozen fellow ministry students. Throughout our time together, we took turns instructing the group. It was her turn to teach and I could sense her […]

50 Jesuses Partying on a Beach

As we learn to live from love and not fear, we can also use the tool of Immanuel prayer to find our best self with Jesus. For me, finding my best self with Jesus means leaning into His joy for me when I feel loneliness overwhelming me. Now, a person can be alone and not […]

My Best Self With Immanuel

By Marlene Allen Over the last couple of weeks, the Life Model Works team has shared what it means to be your best self, versus your false or avatar self. Now and in the coming weeks we will dive into the theme of what it looks like to be your best self with Immanuel.  “I […]