Joyfully Unofficial Elders
By Michael Sullivant Some years back my wife, Terri, and I entered what I like to call our “fourth quarter of life”. In both football and basketball, the fourth quarter is often the decisive quarter for a team’s success. For us, this means being deeply engaged in spreading the love and joys of being Christ-followers […]
Part 2: What Gen Z Needs from Elders
By Hannah Ploegstra Gen Z is a delightful generation whose collective history has set them up to be hungry for input from elders. They were babies and toddlers when 9/11 happened, formed their group identities with the help of social media and iPhones, and when it was finally time to head out into the world […]
Becoming an Extra Parent
By Dr. Karen Struble, Clinical Psychologist In recent years the number of Western-world households without children has risen tremendously. Reasons abound. Some folks search for a suitable (a.k.a. real grown-up) mate, but cannot find one. Others suffer the pain of infertility or other medical conditions. Still others are fertile couples who choose not to bear […]
Flexible Diligence & Parenting
By Michael Sullivant One of the skills we are meant to learn during the parent stage of maturity is to gracefully balance and synchronize our attention and energies to meet the appropriate needs of our spouse, children, extended family, church, work, friends, and the broader community. I’m now almost 70 with five married adult children […]
More Than Our Momentary Failures: Lessons from Parenting in the Child Stage
By Joel and Joca Prudhomme Before having children, I was sure that I would be a great dad. What a surprise to discover as a parent of young children that I seemed completely incapable of doing even half of the wonderful things that I had read in the parenting books! This grand adventure of raising […]
Child Maturity – Learning What Truly Satisfies
By Michel Hendricks Have you ever been hungry, and intended to eat a little snack before dinner and ended up eating way too much and ruining your appetite? Have you ever gotten so obsessed by a sport or hobby that you ignored other important things? Have you ever been hooked on a substance or behavior […]
Beyond Comfort – How Difficult Tasks Fuel Growth
By Michael Sullivant One of the outstanding tasks required to achieve full “childhood” maturity (age 4-14) – according to Dr. Wilder’s 20+ years of research across the centuries and cultures – is to learn to do hard things that might even cause some pain. Generally, this was a big gap in my childhood development. I […]
Understanding Child-Level Maturity
Last month we discussed the first stage of the maturity process, infant maturity. This month we will discover the next stage, child-level maturity. It is important to keep in mind that each stage builds upon – not replaces – the previous maturity stage. While the main goal of infant maturity is to learn to receive, […]
Responding to a Connection Invitation
By Marlene Allen “Mom! Dad! Look! Look at me!” is the cry of a young heart. “Look at me. See me. Validate me. Affirm me. Help me become my own person by acknowledging that my actions have meaning. Enjoy this moment with me. It’s part of me forming my own personality. It’s me venturing out […]
Inside Out 2 – The Great Rewiring
In the original popular movie, “Inside Out,” we meet Riley, a pre-teen girl struggling with the sadness of leaving her hometown and friends behind as she moves to San Francisco. We see the interplay of Joy with more negative emotions, including Sadness and Anger, and learn the centrality of joy in handling negative emotions. “Inside […]
Do You Know When to Yell?
Neuroscience tells us that our brains are wired to seek intensity. Ideally, this intensity should come from joyful interactions and be the foundation for our attachment to people. However, if we experience intense abandonment or dysfunction early on, our young minds can’t discern the difference between good and bad intensity, and we go through life […]
Reflections on TRANSFORM 23
by Jen Pfeiler What a delightful time it was to be together at TRANSFORM 2023! As a member of the Life Model Works administrative staff, I expected to be caught up in the hustle and bustle of making sure things were in order, but I was pleasantly surprised by the inundation of relationally connective people […]
A Sweet Spot For Kids
by Marlene Allen, Life Model Works Board Member Twelve-year-old Tess had one question for me as her children’s pastor, “Why is God always mad at us? I picture Him with a bat ready to get me if I do something wrong”, This simple question began my quest to discover why children would have such a […]