The Tendency Towards Intensity
There are times even the best parenting advice and guidance does not work. As parents, we need to learn how to stay ourselves with our children even when things go wrong and it seems our best strategies are not working. Thankfully, love covers a multitude of sins. My seven-year-old Matthew has a tendency towards intensity. […]
Raising Resilient Children
I want to have a heart to heart with you about raising resilient children. These are children who bounce back and recover when things go wrong. Children who respond to the curve balls of life and relationships with flexibility and fortitude. Children who can quiet and calm themselves on the good and bad days. I […]
Remaining Relational with Flattened Flapjacks
Last night my family enjoyed our weekly tradition of breakfast for dinner. As my boys were devouring their pancakes, I remembered the item I found under the living room rug last week. Pancakes. Yes, that’s correct. Pancakes! A few weeks ago my sons thought it would be funny to sneak a few pancakes and hide them […]
When Brotherly Love Heads South
I just walked out of the shower this morning when I heard my son sobbing in his room. I was surprised by this sound so I quickly ran into his room and scooped him in my arms. I asked, “Andrew, tell me what happened!” Between sobs and slobber, Andrew managed to utter, “Matthew says he […]
How to Return to Joy
This year my family had a lot going on for Mother’s Day. It was busy. In fact, it was so busy that it did not work for us to celebrate Mother’s Day like we usually would – on the day, together as a family. We decided to reschedule my Mother’s Day celebration to another time […]
My Mad Mommy Moment
The other day Andrew was not doing what I asked him to do. He was repeatedly getting distracted from his task. I felt my frustration intensify with each reminder. By the fourth reminder I yelled, “Andrew – DO IT NOW!” As soon as the words flew out of my mouth I observed his little face […]
The Appreciation Tree
This morning Andrew woke up in a sour mood. I noticed his brain’s relational circuits (RCs) were off and after several attempts to help him turn them on again, none of the normal solutions worked. His whining continued, even after I took some time to attune with his feelings and comfort him in his upset. […]
The Fun of Joy and Rest
My oldest son Matthew is now in school full days, so I try to find meaningful ways to connect with Andrew when he is home. Andrew is the youngest child behind his big brother, Matthew, who happens to have a very big, out-going personality, Andrew tends to take a backseat to Matthew’s antics during interactions. […]
Appreciation Changes Everything
Just before bed last night I had an upsetting interaction with a friend. It was not a fight or an argument, but I was worried about her. In the past, something like this would have ruined my sleep. Yep; in days past this distress would have spun out my mind. I would have replayed the […]
Flames of Fury
The other day Chris and I had a couple of interactions that did not go smoothly. Ok, this is an understatement. I walked away from them feeling FURIOUS. I felt boiling mad…imagine steam coming out of my ears! I tried to calm down, but it wasn’t working like usual. Thankfully, the kids were not around […]
The First to Stop Wins
During the last couple of weeks, we have noticed increasing overwhelm levels in our household. I believe much of this could be avoided. You see, overwhelm happens when the people around us fail to stop, pause and “tone it down.” Observers miss the subtle and sometimes not so subtle cues we show that scream, “You’ve […]
Peaches and Rest: Using Family Code Words
“Mommy, you look like you need some peaches”, my four-year-old tells me at the breakfast table this morning, which prompted me to take a deep breath. “Why did he say this?” You ask. Let me tell you about our family code words. About a month ago, our oldest son Matthew had a croup cough. He also […]
Does It Bring Joy?
These last two months have been a crazy season of sickness for our family. One illness after another keeps taking us down, and usually a few at a time. Things seemed to be looking up until a week ago. Andrew (4) came down with a cough. Then Matthew (6) spiked a fever. Next Chris and […]
When Jesus is More Patient than Mommy
Thanksgiving day was a whirlwind with a flurry of cooking, eating, hosting and interacting with family members. As the day began to wind down, I was sitting with my sons reading bedtime stories and praying. At one point I asked the boys to each share something with Jesus they feel thankful for. Andrew (4) immediately […]