How We Are Escaping Enemy Mode In Our Marriage
By Ray and Deborah Woolridge When have you had an enemy mode conversation with someone you love? How does it feel to you? How does it make them feel? As a couple married 36+ years, enemy mode feels like falling down a cliff. Falling into enemy mode is much easier than climbing out of it. […]
Acting Like Myself In Row 6
By Shari Ausley, Life Model Works Board Member Bio: Shari Ausley is a new empty-nester. In 2005 she started a K-12 Christian school in central Florida, a member of Ambleside Schools International. Prior to that she was in full-time Christian service with Cru (formerly Campus Crusade for Christ). She currently serves on the Board of […]
Enhancing Our Faces
By Michael Sullivant “As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.” Proverbs 27:17 NKJV. Practicing the Life Model has much to do with the importance of faces … God’s face, the face of Immanuel, other’s faces, and our own face as well. God has given us, even in infancy, the […]
Relational Discussion or Enemy Mode Argument?
My enemy mode tendencies almost did some damage recently. Becoming relational takes time as neural pathways (FAST track) get retrained. I almost fell into a well-worn path in a discussion that ended relationally but could have taken a turn. My wife Deborah and I are moving this summer. After hundreds of hours on house hunting […]
From Brokenness To Relational Wholeness
By Rebecca Caputo When I was handed a little green book several years ago, I didn’t for a moment expect it to rock the foundation of my beliefs or my life. In my early 40’s I read, “Living From the Heart Jesus Gave You” by Dr. Jim Wilder et al and it changed, well, literally […]
Understanding Shame
As Scripture says, “Anyone who believes in him will never be put to shame (Romans 10:11).” “Wake up from your drunken stupor, as is right, and do not go on sinning. For some have no knowledge of God. I say this to your shame (1 Corinthians 15:34).” Are the above passages contradictory, or is there […]
Fire up your joy today with the Top 10 from Life Model Works
Build Joy with us. Put logs on the joy in your life and celebrate with us. Paul the Apostle said in Philippians 1:3-5 “I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, always in every prayer of mine for you all making my prayer with joy, because of your partnership in the gospel from the first […]
9 Questions about Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a big deal, and it is a bigger topic than one might consider. Dr. Jim Wilder fielded questions at a conference where he spoke about learning to forgive. His answers to those questions are provided here. Question #1 — Can joy be “faked”? Or, can someone trick themselves into believing they are experiencing authentic […]
The Difference Between Appreciation & Gratitude
While working on a writing project I was asked, “Why don’t you use the word gratitude instead of appreciation?” The person asking is a fan of the Joyful Journey book and the interactive gratitude process taught in it, as am I. At first, I thought, “why not?” Everyone is on the gratitude craze right now… Ann Voskamp, […]
The Tendency Towards Intensity
There are times even the best parenting advice and guidance does not work. As parents, we need to learn how to stay ourselves with our children even when things go wrong and it seems our best strategies are not working. Thankfully, love covers a multitude of sins. My seven-year-old Matthew has a tendency towards intensity. […]
Becoming a Gentle Responder
Have you ever wondered why it can be hard to respond well to what others say or do? You have intentions of being loving, kind, encouraging, and then you are in a discussion and you find yourself responding with something like sarcasm, anger, or judgment instead of being a gentle responder. Let’s explore this common […]
The Appreciation Tree
This morning Andrew woke up in a sour mood. I noticed his brain’s relational circuits (RCs) were off and after several attempts to help him turn them on again, none of the normal solutions worked. His whining continued, even after I took some time to attune with his feelings and comfort him in his upset. […]
The World Needs What the Life Model Provides
We were first introduced to the Life Model in 2006, by Karl Lehman, and attended our first Thrive Training in 2007. Thrive Training and many of the other Life Model resources we have used have been very beneficial to our individual growth and healing, as well as to our marriage. We have also witnessed over […]
Bad Eye, Good Eye
You may have heard the term “evil eye.” Perhaps you think of a mom giving her disobedient child “the look.” Or the great fiery eye of Sauron from Lord of the Rings. Or maybe you even know about the evil eye charms many in the Middle East wear with their jewelry to ward off bad luck […]
When Jesus is More Patient than Mommy
Thanksgiving day was a whirlwind with a flurry of cooking, eating, hosting and interacting with family members. As the day began to wind down, I was sitting with my sons reading bedtime stories and praying. At one point I asked the boys to each share something with Jesus they feel thankful for. Andrew (4) immediately […]
Relational Skills Aren't Just for My Benefit
This past weekend I was in line at Wendy’s for a quick lunch and I noticed the cashier was looking a bit frazzled. I heard her speaking to the person in front of me and she sounded angry and gruff. My first thought was, “Yikes, someone is in a bad mood!”. But almost instantly in […]
Turning On Your V-C-R
Last week I had an incident that caused some emotional pain and I wasn’t sure if I was triggered or not. The gist was that I felt accused for something I did not have in my heart, and it hurt. Most of the time, I tend to think of these kinds of painful bumps as […]
3 Things We Need for Emotional Health
Imagine this for a moment: you’ve been tasked with building a model airplane, but you’ve never seen a real airplane and you’re not at all sure what all these parts in front of you actually do. You pick up a propeller in your hand and you look at it from every different angle and ponder […]
10 Ways Life Model Works Builds Relationships
Over the years, many people have been attracted to Life Model Works for the benefits of joyful relationships. Here are 10 ways Life Model Works helps relationships build and grow. We each do our own inventory of our relational health, growth, points of irritation or stagnation, freely deciding with new safe and loving support to […]
3 Steps to Avoid Relational Speed Bumps
There is no way to avoid it, we all need relational skills. The problem is most of us don’t realize that we are missing some! Not until we start having problems in our relationships; or we notice that we keep repeating the same relational speed bumps over and over again. When learned in the early […]