Last month we discussed the first stage of the maturity process, infant maturity. This month we will discover the next stage, child-level maturity. It is important to keep in mind that each stage builds upon – not replaces – the previous maturity stage. While the main goal of infant maturity is to learn to receive, child-level maturity adds in the component of learning to take care of oneself. Growing and developing these child-level maturity skills occurs roughly between 4-14 years of age.
Here are some key aspects of child-level maturity:
- Developing a Sense of Self: At the child level, individuals start to develop a stronger sense of identity and who they are apart from others. They begin to understand their likes, dislikes, and talents they have to offer.
- Communication: Children need a safe space in their community to express what they need. In a healthy environment, they are encouraged to articulate what they think and feel.
- Problem-Solving and Perserverance: At this stage, children begin to develop problem-solving skills and the ability to do things that challenge them.
- Understanding Their Story: As children mature, it is important they understand how their lives fit into the big picture. It is a chance for children to learn to reflect on their own lives and think of how they can impact the future.
While children become more independent, that does not mean they have everything figured out. They still need support and guidance from their family and larger community to experience growth and discover who they are. They need a shoulder to cry on when they want to give up trying something new or challenging. They need space to rest and calm so they can increase their capacity to persevere. As a caregiver, it is important to help children at this stage of life observe their likes and dislikes without forcing them to be exact replicas of their caregivers. Rather, it is the caregiver’s role to help the child see how their talents, interests, and character belong (and play an important role) in the broader context of their family or spiritual community’s group identity.
It is important to note that just as we mentioned in our infant maturity blog series that we never outgrow our need to receive unconditionally at times, we also never outgrow needing to care for our emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being.
