At the core of Thrive, a week-long, immersive training experience are 19 essential relational skills. The first one you’ll learn about is called “Share Joy.”
How do we know when we’re sharing joy? When Facial expressions and voice tones amplify, “We’re glad to be together!”
Signs of Joy
- Facial expressions.
- Change in body language.
- Positive verbal communication.
- Positive emotions.
- Positive physical responses (increased heart rate, dilated pupils).
Relational joy is:
- Contagious.
- A non-verbal expression that escalates with physical cues including eye contact and smiling.
- Reinforced by positive verbal communication.
- Grows into an emotional state when it is shared between two people.
Technically nonverbal expressions of joy are described as right-hemisphere-to-right- hemisphere communication which amplifies our most desired positive emotional state. Relational joy is best conveyed face-to-face but voice tone is a close second.
We develop a strong bond with people who light up to see us. Skill One makes life, church, marriage, business and everything else better. Ideally we return to joy from every unpleasant state the brain knows.
We don’t spend much time thinking about joy until something happens. Our joy levels are either profoundly low or highly elevated.
Creating Joy
- Dopamine is released when we experience joy. This leads to satisfaction, empowerment and motivation. Ideally joy leads to rest then serotonin recharges us for more joy.
- If joy levels sink, our brains turn to BEEPS. BEEPS is an acronym for Behaviors, Experiences, Events, People and Substances that hijack the brain. BEEPS artificially regulates our feelings.
A loss of joy leads to:
- Anger
- Disgust
- Silence
- Broken relationships
Our families substitute joy with activities, sports, movies, television, computers, busyness and endless distractions. This pseudo joy leaves us empty.
A loss of joy among individuals leads to a loss of joy within a community. Churches become rigid and rule-based. Parents focus on behavior. Culture links joy with sex, shame, fear and skepticism. Without Skill One we risk passing on the very patterns we despise.
As we remember, the creation, expression and sharing of joy defines our personality. “Why are you so happy?” people wonder.
